A Lost Cause

Gasping for air as she runs from the overpowering storm, rain drops pound against her skin. The water washes everything away, she’s consumed by a foreign, unrecognisable selfishness. Her lungs on fire aching for air, legs burning as the muscles clench she staggers.

Raindrops like leeches pulls at the memories from her mind.

‘You can’t keep coming and going’ she screamed,
‘If you want to leave just go and if you want to stay just stay.’
 

Her overexerted body aching, heart threatening to spill out of her heaving chest. The air in her lungs unable to catch up like there wasn’t enough oxygen in the atmosphere.

No comforting hands, just a throbbing heart and raging pulse, her fingers sinking and clawing further into the soggy patch of field.

She closes her eyes unwillingly flashing to the events from earlier today that play like a movie in her disoriented mind.

‘It wasn’t my fault, I didn’t do anything wrong…
I followed all the rules, I never got in trouble, I never cried for anything extra, I listened when you were sad… I’m a nice person, why isn’t that enough? 
why am I always left behind?
I told you things – things I never knew how to say aloud – never been said…’ 
 

The clatter of thunder bringing her tumbling into the present. Scrunching her eyes up once again, she desperately rubs them. The little energy floating away from her, making her body listless.